paper beats rock, Texan beats American...

I was Not prepared to step off the bus into Texas this morning… after the brief yet lasting impressions I’ve gotten in the last three years of Texas (enter random “Woohoo!” here by the Texan in the audience) I could only imagine the amount of state pride I was about to experience.  As someone who doesn’t specifically take pride in my state but rather in the identity of my community as a whole, I’ve always been interested in the identity of Texans and the perpetuation of this idea of ‘independence’.  But after an entire day in San Antonio, I was somewhat amazed at the identity I encountered in the Lone Star State. 

Our day began at the Alamo –

The Alamo promotes itself through that same heroified history as the verbal recap (and every sign) refers to the historical place as a “Shrine of Texas Liberty”.  The decision in this language, to use the word “Texas” instead of “American” was somewhat shocking at first.  After a 10-15 minute review of the story of the Alamo (given by a tour guide in a fashion similar to that of the Duckmaster in Memphis) I realized that this story of being a Texan was being reinforced through this specific linguistic framing.  The idea of “otherness” was strongly reflected in the way the Alamo presented its story, constantly emphasizing the few hundred men who defended the fort for Texas – calling them by their full-names, detailing their histories, and therefore perpetuating the idea of only telling one side of the story of a significant part of a people’s history. 

As we interviewed native Texans on the street, asking them what it meant to be an American, I received the response that perfectly embodied what Texas presents itself as: “I’m not an American, I’m a Texan.”  As I stood there, attempting to keep an unbiased visage, I felt my mind exploding with frustration at the idea of disclaiming Americanism simply because one was born in a state that proclaimed itself its own country years ago.  However, in trying to maintain a positive perspective, I continued my questioning of what it meant, then, to be a Texan.  In response, one of the men being interviewed stated that Texas exists as an extension of the American ideals upon which the U.S. was created.  The concepts of freedom, honor, and rights and the citizen’s protection of these liberties manifest themselves in the Texan mentality and independence.  While this was the clearest and most understandable depiction of Texan pride, I still found myself weary of what it was exactly that not only drew people to the state, but then held their attention and satisfied their happiness to an extent that they felt that they were a Texan first, and all else second. 

After interviewing locals and tourists, we had class on the steps next to the Alamo.  In the middle of our conversation, I looked up and to my surprise there was Matt Burchett! walking up to our group with his wife Holly.  For all of you who don’t know the backstory to the 40 states trip, Ken and Matt formed the idea about two years ago, while Matt was still working at Belmont.  He and his wife currently live in Waco, TX and drove a couple hours to meet our group.  (Fun fact: Dr Pepper was invented in Waco and it’s the only place in the U.S. where you can buy the original recipe – with real sugar.  Matt brought us a couple six packs and they were delicious.)  After we caught them up on how our trip had unfolded so far, and answered some questions they posed, we asked them what it meant to be an American, and how that Texas identity impacted/developed with their national identity.  As Matt began to recount there story, the draw of Texas became incredibly clear…

He and his wife had both grown up in Texas, constantly surrounded by their families throughout the state.  After attending Baylor University (as a form of continuing the legacy that generations of their families had begun), Matt and Holly moved to Tennessee for about seven years, where he worked at Belmont and she continued her career as a nurse.   They described how much they enjoyed Nashville’s green landscape, as it strongly countered the dry Texas heat and land, yet how they couldn’t stand being away from all of their family.  Through not being able to visit sick relatives or attend annual celebrations, they decided to move back to Texas in order to re-strengthen familial connections.  However, in detailing their move back home, they experienced an immense sense of personal growth, as distancing themselves from “home” allowed them an open-mindedness and individuality that would’ve otherwise been unattainable.  It was at this point that Texas, for the first time, was undifferentiated from all other places in my mind…

The idea of home has been a reoccurring theme throughout the country, from the locals at Graceland, to the employees at the Central High School Museum, to the St. Bernard’s Community Center in New Orleans, and now across Texas.  The American Oxford Dictionary defines “home” as: “a place where something flourishes, is most typically found, or from which it originates.”  This belonging represents a key ideal in the American ideal thus far, as people seem to constantly be displacing and replacing themselves in order to satisfy their selves. 

I hope to see this embodiment of home throughout the rest of our trip, and perhaps even redefine my own idea of home through visualizing and experiencing the homes of thousands of others…